Opinion & Commentary

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The Life Before & After Marriage

The marriage is a Devine or Wine. It is an immortal bond between the two soul and body. However, one should know how to run it. It is the same way, the way we have to first learn how to ride a bike. Therefore, without the knowledge, it becomes wine. The feelings of being a married man. If I talk ...
Lokeish Umak
Lokeish Umak

The marriage is a Devine or Wine. It is an immortal bond between the two soul and body. However, one should know how to run it. It is the same way, the way we have to first learn how to ride a bike. Therefore, without the knowledge, it becomes wine.

The feelings of being a married man.

If I talk about, how do I feel being a married man? There are many things. Consequently, unpredictable happiness is such a huge that it can't be told in the few words. Everyone has their definition, but this is mine. It was a day when I was working in the office and a thought came in my mind that doctor gave us due date 5th of Jun. 2017 to my wife. And I have to take leaves on those days and I had already told to my boss those tentative dates (baby delivery), but I was not that cautious enough. Those days were the starting of the relationship, unknown feelings of being fathering and husband. Many times laughing, I told my wife that I will make delivery of our baby at home (the old man's brain) and my wife including my mother and her mother laughed too.

Left those days when women deliver the baby at home.

We both were curiously waiting for our baby and other family members, including my parents. They were thinking that there is a boy coming home. But somewhere in my mind, a feeling of a daughter was holding the nerves tight. I remember, except me, no one was ready to believe that there was a baby girl breathing through the intestine of my wife. There was a reason behind that, in our family for many years first was a baby boy and then again a baby boy and third child used to be a girl from the last two generations.

Establishing the connections with wife

When I got married I was so happy choosing a girl by my father and I had told my father that I would love if you take a pride choosing a girl for me. And I also told him that I give you two year for this. And if you were unable to find the one, then let me handle this. I knew that it was a fair deal. In India, no father wants getting married his son/daughter without the permission of the family, especially it happens in love marriage. This is what I love India because we featured the great heritage. So, coming back to the point, how I had established the connections with my wife? Let me tell you first, though it was arranged marriage, we both fell in love when we saw each other for the first time. And our wedding date was almost two months late, and within those days our bond became so strong and with the cords wrapped around it of all the feelings. So, we both had such understanding that took place so smoothly after we got married.

Expectations and plannings after the knot

The expectations and planning are everyone's first things after the wedding, none of us that much lazy avoiding it. We both had many expectations too for each other and future planning. We were mad about our planning, like every night before bed our plans were changing like the wind shifts in any direction. It was that sudden as the dark cloud on the head disappears in a second and gives sunlight and vice versa.

My expectations from my wife were as simple as that, as like an old Indian married woman living their life. Neither was I looking for a wife who would be working in office nor simple one who behave and stands in military order. I was the one who wanted a wife who would be so romantic and stay at home. As well as, bear children, take care of them and be a good coach for our children's future so that she/he shouldn't forget our cultures which were living in both of us existed from many years. This was what I can say was planning. If I talk about my professional life, there was much planning, which I will discuss in my next blog.

Understanding level of the couple

When I was a child, I came to know that understanding plays an authoritative role in our life. If you don't understand your parents, then there won't be a love bond between family. One positive thought would bring much good understanding between us, and I used to do that. Hope and patience would help better in understanding in any couple. Thanks to God, that he has given me such good understanding parents and I inherited it. I always remember an old saying that “As the tree, so the fruit”. And I hope it inherits in my child too.

The Cares and Love in marriage

If you want to survive last longer in any relation do not forget two things that are love and care. In my case, as far as in my childhood I was a lovely and cute boy and the love which I got from my family was tremendous. And what I have learned from them was the exceptional experience and those learning would help me survive my relations with my loved ones. The things that had taught me by my parents and in the society where I lived is a simple mantra.

If you smile, in return, you will get the same.

One successful mantra

In my married life too, if it brings in the notice that this dose have been less, then I increase it. When I became a father, the love and care rose spontaneously. There will always be fights between husband and wife, and that is required to survive the relationship. Therefore, it reminds you to understand the value of Love and Care, somewhere you realize, run for it and bring the situations back to normal.

Yelling and joking in married life

I learned it from my group of friends, when yelling and joking sometimes make an irate friends happy. However, it sometimes also worsens the situation. That’s what we need to keep in mind. When there is any fight between us and the responsible one yells and jokes. We had already decided to overcome the anger by a sweet joke. I knew the anger is the biggest enemy of the human being. It is the only one who bodge the life of someone.

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Hobbies, Like and Dislike

One thing surprised me, that was our hobbies, like and dislike. They were the same. But only one thing brought in the notice that she does not bring her hobbies to life. I believe that it is hobbies that give us a meaning to our life. She likes to help me find a joy in my hobbies. However, her interests are also the same. Occasionally, we ended with a fight if the things won’t work properly.

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Lokeish Umak

Lokeish Umak

Lokeish Umak writes about his favorite topics, such as essay, poems, health, fitness, nutrition, etc. He also invites guests on his podcast show, "Chronicle Conversations."
View all posts by Lokeish Umak

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